The background to this post is here. So anyway, today I finally got around to taking my little girl for the IQ test.
I didn't tell her that she would be going for a test. I just told her that I was taking her somewhere to play some games. When she asked me what kind of games, I just told her, "Oh, puzzles. Many different kinds of puzzles. They're really fun!".
At the clinic, the psychologist had a brief discussion with me and my wife, and then asked us to leave our daughter behind and come back in 90 minutes. We went off to do some shopping. When we came back, my daughter had completed her IQ test and happily announced to us that the puzzles were really fun and she had enjoyed herself.
We asked the psychologist how my daughter had done. The psychologist said that she couldn't give a definitive answer yet - she had to do some analysis and compute the scores first. However, the rough estimate was that my daughter was well above average on an overall basis, and probably in the gifted range for verbal reasoning, but perhaps not in the gifted range for other areas.
I know the technical term for this. It's "asynchronous development". Human intelligence isn't a single attribute - instead there are about eight different types of human intelligences. For example, a person may be gifted in logic; but average in interpersonal intelligence; and poor in his linguistic intelligence.
Asynchronous development is the term to describe people who are unevenly gifted. The psychologist's comments indicate that my daughter is linguistically gifted - her natural ability to communicate, analyse, reason and express herself by using language is very high - but that she isn't gifted in all other areas.
I guess she takes after her daddy. I know that as a child, I learned to speak, read and write well at an unusually early age (those were my first steps towards becoming, at different times in my life, a top law student; a published poet; a nationally prominent blogger; a litigation lawyer and a writer for the SAF). But at the same time, I also know that I was never smart in the way that my big brother is EQ-smart with people; nor in the way that my other brother is smart with visual images and artistic ideas.
Anyway, it will take some time for the full report on my daughter's IQ to be produced (because the clinic is temporarily closing down for the Christmas and New Year holidays).
I like to think that everyone has a special talent in something, and that the only big difference is that some of us have discovered our gifts, and the rest of us have not. Of course, as a parent, I am particularly interested in helping my own children fulfill their potential.
Gadis Bispak Imut
Underwear What Colour?
I was at work. It was about 5 pm. It was going to be another long day (or rather, night). I planned to finish three more tasks before leaving the office.
The first task was to attend a meeting to discuss our new deal with a London-based asset management company acting for a sovereign wealth fund.
The second task was to read a document about the proposed corporate restructuring of one of our clients, a major Asian oil refining company.
The third was to review a set of legal documents that we were planning to sign with a stock exchange. The stock exchange was hoping to receive my comments by tonight.
It was all very serious work. But first I needed to pee. I went to the bathroom, pee'd at the urinal, and casually tugged at the zip to pull it back up.
Unexpectedly, the zip broke off.
Okay ... Not good. Retreated into a toilet cubicle and closed the door. Took off my pants completely and tried to fix the zip back. Not successful. Gave up after 5 minutes.
Put on my pants again and discreetly walked back to my desk. Looked down a few times to inspect myself. Unfortunately, this was one of those pants where the fly, if not zipped up, would open very wide. So wide that one could easily see my underwear. Which happened to be white today, very conspicuous against the dark colour of my trousers.
Under these circumstances, there didn't seem to be much of a choice. I couldn't be seen around the office like this.
Too bad for the sovereign wealth fund. And the corporate restructuring. And the stock exchange. I quickly left the office, clutching my bag somewhat awkwardly at the front of my body. Downstairs, I hopped into a taxi and went straight home.
An early day for Mr Wang, for once.
That wasn't so difficult, after all. All you really have to do is ... just ... walk .... out ....
Gadis Bispak Imut
The first task was to attend a meeting to discuss our new deal with a London-based asset management company acting for a sovereign wealth fund.
The second task was to read a document about the proposed corporate restructuring of one of our clients, a major Asian oil refining company.
The third was to review a set of legal documents that we were planning to sign with a stock exchange. The stock exchange was hoping to receive my comments by tonight.
It was all very serious work. But first I needed to pee. I went to the bathroom, pee'd at the urinal, and casually tugged at the zip to pull it back up.
Unexpectedly, the zip broke off.
Okay ... Not good. Retreated into a toilet cubicle and closed the door. Took off my pants completely and tried to fix the zip back. Not successful. Gave up after 5 minutes.
Put on my pants again and discreetly walked back to my desk. Looked down a few times to inspect myself. Unfortunately, this was one of those pants where the fly, if not zipped up, would open very wide. So wide that one could easily see my underwear. Which happened to be white today, very conspicuous against the dark colour of my trousers.
Under these circumstances, there didn't seem to be much of a choice. I couldn't be seen around the office like this.
Too bad for the sovereign wealth fund. And the corporate restructuring. And the stock exchange. I quickly left the office, clutching my bag somewhat awkwardly at the front of my body. Downstairs, I hopped into a taxi and went straight home.
An early day for Mr Wang, for once.
That wasn't so difficult, after all. All you really have to do is ... just ... walk .... out ....
Gadis Bispak Imut
Work/Life Imbalance
The manpower jinx in my department continues.
A week ago, one of my colleagues suddenly fell very ill. He had to be sent to hospital. A CT scan revealed a serious problem. It was literally a life-&-death matter. He had to undergo emergency brain surgery. The surgery went well, and he is out of Intensive Care, but he is still in hospital. He won't be back at work for several weeks.
Meanwhile, yesterday, it was announced that another colleague had resigned. Not even bothering to stick around to collect the bonus for 2010. Mr Foreign Talent, who came to sunny little Singapore 4 years ago, with wife and kids in tow, is now packing up and going back to his home country. He hasn't found a new job. He just doesn't want to work here anymore.
Throughout 2010, people have been quitting and most of them have not been replaced. The office has so many empty desks now that it's depressing.
Last night was also my department's Christmas party. All these years, I've always made it a point to go to the Christmas party. This time, I didn't go. I would have liked to. But I had too much work. So instead I was in the office working till slightly past midnight. As I worked, new emails continued to arrive into my inbox - from London and New York. These are the perils of working in a global investment bank - the sun never sets, and the work never ends.
I've been told that I'm well on track for promotion. Barring any unexpected circumstances,m the promotion should happen in February next year. I suppose this is a good thing. I suppose that I should feel happy or excited. On the other hand, I cannot honestly say that I feel happy and excited. Right now, nothing about working here feels happy or exciting to me.
Part of me is angry with myself, because I know that I am responsible for maintaining my own work/life balance. I know that I am at liberty to just walk out at 6 or 7 pm and that no one would say anything about it. What compels me to stay later and later in the office - as the overall manpower shrinks and my own workload grows heavier and heavier - is my own sense of responsibility and professionalism. It's my own warped drive and determination to get my work done, with a certain degree of quality and care.
I was discussing this with another colleague yesterday - he consistently works late too, in fact, later than me. I know that like me, he still tries his best. What did I tell him yesterday? I said that one day, if he notices that I'm regularly leaving home at 6 pm, then this means I don't care anymore and I've given up on this place.
As of today, I haven't given up. Yet.
Gadis Bispak Imut
A week ago, one of my colleagues suddenly fell very ill. He had to be sent to hospital. A CT scan revealed a serious problem. It was literally a life-&-death matter. He had to undergo emergency brain surgery. The surgery went well, and he is out of Intensive Care, but he is still in hospital. He won't be back at work for several weeks.
Meanwhile, yesterday, it was announced that another colleague had resigned. Not even bothering to stick around to collect the bonus for 2010. Mr Foreign Talent, who came to sunny little Singapore 4 years ago, with wife and kids in tow, is now packing up and going back to his home country. He hasn't found a new job. He just doesn't want to work here anymore.
Throughout 2010, people have been quitting and most of them have not been replaced. The office has so many empty desks now that it's depressing.
Last night was also my department's Christmas party. All these years, I've always made it a point to go to the Christmas party. This time, I didn't go. I would have liked to. But I had too much work. So instead I was in the office working till slightly past midnight. As I worked, new emails continued to arrive into my inbox - from London and New York. These are the perils of working in a global investment bank - the sun never sets, and the work never ends.
I've been told that I'm well on track for promotion. Barring any unexpected circumstances,m the promotion should happen in February next year. I suppose this is a good thing. I suppose that I should feel happy or excited. On the other hand, I cannot honestly say that I feel happy and excited. Right now, nothing about working here feels happy or exciting to me.
Part of me is angry with myself, because I know that I am responsible for maintaining my own work/life balance. I know that I am at liberty to just walk out at 6 or 7 pm and that no one would say anything about it. What compels me to stay later and later in the office - as the overall manpower shrinks and my own workload grows heavier and heavier - is my own sense of responsibility and professionalism. It's my own warped drive and determination to get my work done, with a certain degree of quality and care.
I was discussing this with another colleague yesterday - he consistently works late too, in fact, later than me. I know that like me, he still tries his best. What did I tell him yesterday? I said that one day, if he notices that I'm regularly leaving home at 6 pm, then this means I don't care anymore and I've given up on this place.
As of today, I haven't given up. Yet.
Gadis Bispak Imut
Poetry on a Friday
Meet Anna, the latest addition to my daughter's doll collection. If you notice that Anna seems to be wearing something very similar to a CHIJ Saint Nicholas uniform, well, that's because she is.I received this little doll last Friday afternoon, as a token of appreciation from the school. CHIJ was organising a poetry event, and I was one of the two invited speakers. The other invited speaker was Marc Nair, who had recently published his second book, entitled Chai, which is a collection of his travel poems.
About 250 students attended. Most were from CHIJ Saint Nicks itself, but there were also perhaps 20 students from other schools including Anderson Secondary and Deyi Secondary. I spoke about how to explore one's everyday experiences and circumstances and use them as material for creative writing. In retrospect, I probably could have simplified my presentation and made it a little less high-brow.
I also read five poems from my book Two Baby Hands. One of the poems was The Couple Next Door, a poem about wife abuse, set in the HDB heartlands. Coincidentally, a CHIJ literature teacher told me that another school, Singapore Chinese Girls School (SCGS), had just used this poem to set an exam question in their literature prelim paper.
- The Couple Next Door
Sometimes at night I hear them fight. I think
it's over money. Usually he's drunk. He always wins.
Hits her with something heavy - I can't tell what.
She cries awhile, then falls silent. A door slams.
This happens about once or twice a week.
I listen intently to all their fights. I blast my radio.
He will hear me. And know that I can hear him too.
My small intrusions. My vague useless gestures.
My rock music turning violent, bearing futile witness,
battering doors at midnight demanding entry.
What does she do, after he falls asleep?
Perhaps she lies besides him, counting the reasons
not to leave. This time not so bad, no need to see doctor.
Maybe: I cannot go. We are already married.
Or worse - He won't do it again. I know he won't do it again.
Sometimes in the mornings, on the way to work, I see her
in the common corridor. She must know that I know.
Her eyes avoid mine. I let the walls stand.
I will be the stranger who sees and hears nothing.
I believe we both prefer it that way.
Perhaps a little overly dark, for teenaged students. But then again, perhaps not - since SCGS had seen fit to use it as an examination question. Ah well.
Quite a number of secondary schools in Singapore use my poems for their literature lessons from time to time. It all started several years ago, when the Education Ministry asked for my permission to include my poems in their official "teaching resources" file, for literature teachers. Although I don't get paid for this, I am pleased that this allows many of my poems to get a regular readership, year after year, among Singapore's literature students.
Even if my poems are now ... homework. :D
Gadis Bispak Imut
Babies and Fractures and Einstein on the Violin
In terms of manpower, my department has been jinxed most of the year.
Here are the developments in October alone. One colleague went on paternity leave. Another colleague will go on paternity leave any day now. And another colleague fell down a staircase this week, fracturing her leg, so that means six weeks' MC.
I am happy for the two new dads. And very sorry for the stairs-tripper. I am also sorry for myself - because guess who has to do all the work, while all these other people are away?
Rather ironic, because next week I am to give a talk at CHIJ Saint Nicholas (it's a literature camp, for students from six schools) and one of the things that the organiser asked me to talk about is how I successfully juggle my career with my creative writing.
Since blunt honesty is one of my more endearing traits, I don't think I will paint a pretty picture for them.
It's bloody tough. My progress on Book 2 is slow as snails.
One thing I will say is that everyone should have at least one passion, outside of and away from their career.
Doesn't matter what you do for a living, doesn't matter even if you really, really like your job. That one passion, away from your main job, allows you to recharge, renew, gain another perspective, live and learn and grow in a different way.
If creative writing is your thing, then that's great. If it's something else, that's great too. As long as you find it.
Einstein used to play the violin. Did you know that?
In other literary news, I'll be reviewing a new book - Reaching for Stones, by Chandra Nair - for Quarterly Literary Review Singapore. This is a pretty hefty collection, compiling his poems from 1963 to 2009. No further comments from me at this stage, as I just received the book (free review copy, yay!) yesterday and haven't read it yet.
Also, my publisher just told me that he's in talks with an electronic publisher in the US to license them the rights to reproduce and distribute my poetry book Two Baby Hands in any "electronic format or media, now in existence or hereafter developed".
I wonder whether that means I'll be able to read my own book on my iPhone. I would love to be an iPhone app - wouldn't that be cool?
Gadis Bispak Imut
Here are the developments in October alone. One colleague went on paternity leave. Another colleague will go on paternity leave any day now. And another colleague fell down a staircase this week, fracturing her leg, so that means six weeks' MC.
I am happy for the two new dads. And very sorry for the stairs-tripper. I am also sorry for myself - because guess who has to do all the work, while all these other people are away?
Rather ironic, because next week I am to give a talk at CHIJ Saint Nicholas (it's a literature camp, for students from six schools) and one of the things that the organiser asked me to talk about is how I successfully juggle my career with my creative writing.
Since blunt honesty is one of my more endearing traits, I don't think I will paint a pretty picture for them.
It's bloody tough. My progress on Book 2 is slow as snails.
One thing I will say is that everyone should have at least one passion, outside of and away from their career.
Doesn't matter what you do for a living, doesn't matter even if you really, really like your job. That one passion, away from your main job, allows you to recharge, renew, gain another perspective, live and learn and grow in a different way.
If creative writing is your thing, then that's great. If it's something else, that's great too. As long as you find it.
Einstein used to play the violin. Did you know that?
In other literary news, I'll be reviewing a new book - Reaching for Stones, by Chandra Nair - for Quarterly Literary Review Singapore. This is a pretty hefty collection, compiling his poems from 1963 to 2009. No further comments from me at this stage, as I just received the book (free review copy, yay!) yesterday and haven't read it yet.
Also, my publisher just told me that he's in talks with an electronic publisher in the US to license them the rights to reproduce and distribute my poetry book Two Baby Hands in any "electronic format or media, now in existence or hereafter developed".
I wonder whether that means I'll be able to read my own book on my iPhone. I would love to be an iPhone app - wouldn't that be cool?
Gadis Bispak Imut
The Perils of Not Attending Kindergarten
Okay, this is my situation (I mentioned it briefly in my previous post too).
My wife and I got some hassles from the Education Ministry this year, when we registered our daughter for primary school. The reason was that we hadn't sent our daughter for Kindergarten Two.
The first hassle came, when my wife was actually at the school, on Registration Day. My wife had to fill up a form, and at the space where she was to write the name of the kindergarten that my daughter had attended, my wife wrote "N.A". Then the MOE officer became quite rude, kicked up a fuss and said things like "How do we know that your daughter is ready for primary school, if she hasn't even done her K2?"
My wife pointed out that:
(1) Currently, kindergarten isn't compulsory in Singapore;
(2) There is no basis to reject a child from a primary school, just because she hasn't done her kindergarten;
(3) It isn't that we didn't give our daughter any education. Quite apart from homeschooling, we also sent her for various enrichment classes. It's just that our daughter did not go to kindergarten.
Finally, the MOE officer grudgingly registered my daughter, and we thought that this would be the end of the matter. However, over the next month or so, my wife continued to receive a number of telephone calls from the Ministry, with someone on the other line constantly asking my wife questions about why we hadn't sent our daughter to kindergarten.
The questions had a somewhat accusing tone, as if we were negligent, useless parents ... or parents too broke to send the child to kindergarten.
Finally, feeling quite exasperated, I sent a very long email to the Education Ministry telling them, in effect, to "get lost", and also informing them in great detail why we didn't send our daughter for K2.
Briefly, my daughter is very bright. She found K1 very easy. It bored her. She was way ahead of most of her peers, in her reading & numerical abilities. She's also very much ahead in other areas like social development. 85% of her first year in kindergarten was basically a waste of time for her.
So after she finished K1, we decided not to send her for K2. Instead we sent her to a variety of enrichment courses at different places (English; Chinese; Maths; and Speech & Drama), picking centres that customise their teaching to cater for kids of different ability levels. This has allowed my daughter to learn at a pace quick enough for the lessons to stay interesting for her.
On a weekly basis, my daughter still spends much less time in a classroom setting, than she would be if she were attending K2. But that's not the point. Most of the time in a K2 class would be irrelevant, boring and useless for her. At least now, whatever time she spends studying is spent on materials and lessons at an appropriate level for her.
Anyway, after further discussion with the Education Ministry, their tone changed at some point. And now they are advising my wife and me to send our daughter for testing, to assess whether she is "gifted".
The thing is - I'm not too sure where to send my daughter for testing, and what that process is all about. The Education Ministry did give some tips, but I would still like to know more about this whole matter. Also, if any of you can recommend a suitable psychologist, I would appreciate this. Thanks .....
Gadis Bispak Imut
My wife and I got some hassles from the Education Ministry this year, when we registered our daughter for primary school. The reason was that we hadn't sent our daughter for Kindergarten Two.
The first hassle came, when my wife was actually at the school, on Registration Day. My wife had to fill up a form, and at the space where she was to write the name of the kindergarten that my daughter had attended, my wife wrote "N.A". Then the MOE officer became quite rude, kicked up a fuss and said things like "How do we know that your daughter is ready for primary school, if she hasn't even done her K2?"
My wife pointed out that:
(1) Currently, kindergarten isn't compulsory in Singapore;
(2) There is no basis to reject a child from a primary school, just because she hasn't done her kindergarten;
(3) It isn't that we didn't give our daughter any education. Quite apart from homeschooling, we also sent her for various enrichment classes. It's just that our daughter did not go to kindergarten.
Finally, the MOE officer grudgingly registered my daughter, and we thought that this would be the end of the matter. However, over the next month or so, my wife continued to receive a number of telephone calls from the Ministry, with someone on the other line constantly asking my wife questions about why we hadn't sent our daughter to kindergarten.
The questions had a somewhat accusing tone, as if we were negligent, useless parents ... or parents too broke to send the child to kindergarten.
Finally, feeling quite exasperated, I sent a very long email to the Education Ministry telling them, in effect, to "get lost", and also informing them in great detail why we didn't send our daughter for K2.
Briefly, my daughter is very bright. She found K1 very easy. It bored her. She was way ahead of most of her peers, in her reading & numerical abilities. She's also very much ahead in other areas like social development. 85% of her first year in kindergarten was basically a waste of time for her.
So after she finished K1, we decided not to send her for K2. Instead we sent her to a variety of enrichment courses at different places (English; Chinese; Maths; and Speech & Drama), picking centres that customise their teaching to cater for kids of different ability levels. This has allowed my daughter to learn at a pace quick enough for the lessons to stay interesting for her.
On a weekly basis, my daughter still spends much less time in a classroom setting, than she would be if she were attending K2. But that's not the point. Most of the time in a K2 class would be irrelevant, boring and useless for her. At least now, whatever time she spends studying is spent on materials and lessons at an appropriate level for her.
Anyway, after further discussion with the Education Ministry, their tone changed at some point. And now they are advising my wife and me to send our daughter for testing, to assess whether she is "gifted".
The thing is - I'm not too sure where to send my daughter for testing, and what that process is all about. The Education Ministry did give some tips, but I would still like to know more about this whole matter. Also, if any of you can recommend a suitable psychologist, I would appreciate this. Thanks .....
Gadis Bispak Imut
But I Am Really Not Dead
In the past few weeks, I've been getting emails of a certain kind, from a few of my readers. The emails sound carefully phrased, as if the reader genuinely wants to ask something, but isn't sure how to ask it without coming across as intrusive or presumptuous, and is therefore picking and choosing his words delicately.
Well, here's the answer to the question. No, I am not dead, nor dying, nor ill, nor has any drastic event unfolded in my personal life. The reason I have not been blogging is just that I have not felt like blogging. In fact, I haven't felt like blogging for a long time. I haven't even experienced any withdrawal symptoms.
Work has certainly been keeping me very busy though. Right now, I am working in an environment which not only refuses to hire additional lawyers to deal with the increasing workload, but also refuses to hire replacement lawyers (to replace those who have left). So basically, a shrinking pool of manpower is taking on an expanding amount of work. Then the remaining employees grow stressed and unhappy and become more prone to quit, thus feeding the vicious cycle.
Oh well, what is new? This is not the first place where I've seen this happen. Very large organisations are like very large dinosaurs - they are strong, powerful but not necessarily very intelligent. In fact, I was only 18 years old when I got to see a very strong, powerful and stupid organisation close-up. No prizes for the right answer.
In other news:
Gadis Bispak Imut
Well, here's the answer to the question. No, I am not dead, nor dying, nor ill, nor has any drastic event unfolded in my personal life. The reason I have not been blogging is just that I have not felt like blogging. In fact, I haven't felt like blogging for a long time. I haven't even experienced any withdrawal symptoms.
Work has certainly been keeping me very busy though. Right now, I am working in an environment which not only refuses to hire additional lawyers to deal with the increasing workload, but also refuses to hire replacement lawyers (to replace those who have left). So basically, a shrinking pool of manpower is taking on an expanding amount of work. Then the remaining employees grow stressed and unhappy and become more prone to quit, thus feeding the vicious cycle.
Oh well, what is new? This is not the first place where I've seen this happen. Very large organisations are like very large dinosaurs - they are strong, powerful but not necessarily very intelligent. In fact, I was only 18 years old when I got to see a very strong, powerful and stupid organisation close-up. No prizes for the right answer.
In other news:
1. My new house is still not quite ready, but I hope to be able to collect the keys sometime next month. (Please recommend a few out-of-the way places where I can buy cheap, good furniture).What? You were hoping that I'd give you some news about socio-political issues in Singapore? Instead of all this boring, trivial stuff about my own life? Sorry, folks. I haven't really been reading the newspapers myself.
2. I am still diligently swimming, currently averaging about 90 laps per week, and finally, I have taught myself to do a decent flip turn (well, decent by my own humble standards).
3. I bought myself a new classical guitar! And I am trying to grow the fingernails on my right hand, to achieve that brighter, clearer quality of sound when plucking the strings.
4. I have a new blog. But it's going to bore the hell out of you, unless you happen to be working in the same kind of job as I do (heck, even if you work in the same kind of job as I do, you might still be bored to death). Anyway, here it is - the Asian Banking Lawyer blog.
5. Next month I'm giving a talk to about 250 Literature students from six schools, about poetry and how to write it and read it. It's an event organised by CHIJ Saint Nicholas.
6. I recently met up with two Singapore filmmakers (a producer and a director) who wanted me to share the juicy details of what DPPs really do for a living. The two filmmakers are making a new film that involves crime - and the main character is a DPP.
7. Ever since I registered my daughter for Primary One (that was back in July), the Education Ministry has become aware that I haven't sent her to Kindergarten Two. Since then, every fortnight or so, someone from the Education Ministry calls up my wife to ask why. I guess that my wife and I, as parents, are now being suspected of being negligent or very poor.
8. I have now got an iPhone 4! For $50 only!! And I pay zero dollars for the monthly subscription!!
Gadis Bispak Imut
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